Top 5 Adult Jokes of 2006

> Number 5:
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> A man bumps into a Woman in a hotel lobby and as he does,
>his elbow goes into her breast They are both quite startled. The man
>turns to her and says "Ma'am, if your heart is as soft as your breast,
>I know you'll forgive me."
>
>She replies, "If your penis is as hard as your elbow, I'm in room 221."
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> Number 4:
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> A businessman boards a flight and is seated next to a
>gorgeous woman. He notices she is reading a manual about sexual statistics.
>He
>asks her about it and she replies, "This is a very interesting book. It
>says that American Indians have the longest penises and Italian men are
>the best in bed. By the way, my name is Jill. What's yours?"
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>"Tonto Tortolini, nice to meet you."
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> Number 3:
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> One night, as a couple lays down for bed, the husband
>starts rubbing his wife's arm. The wife turns over and says "I'm sorry
>honey, I've got a gynecologist appointment tomorrow and I want to stay
>fresh."
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>The husband, rejected, turns over. A few minutes later, he rolls back
>over
>and taps his wife again. "Do you have a dentist appointment tomorrow
>too?"
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> Number 2:
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> Bill worked in a pickle factory. He had been employed
>there for a number of years when he came home one day to confess to his
>wife that he had terrible compulsion. He had an urge to stick his penis
>into the pickle slicer.
>
>His wife suggested that he should see a sex therapist to talk about it,
>but Bill said he would be too embarrassed. He vowed to overcome the
>compulsion on his own.
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>One day a few weeks later, Bill came home. His wife could see at once
>that something was seriously wrong.
>
>"What's wrong, Bill?" she asked.
>"Do you remember th at I told you how I had this tremendous urge to put
>my penis into the pickle slicer?"
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> "Oh, Bill, you didn't.""Yes, I did."
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>"My! God, Bill, what happened?"
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>"I got fired"
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>"No, Bill. I mean, what happened with the pickle slicer?"
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>"Oh..she got fired too."
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> Number 1:
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> A couple had been married for 50 years. They were sitting at the
>breakfast table one morning when the wife says, "Just think, fifty
>years ago we were sitting here at this breakfast table together."
>
>"I know," the old man said, "We were probably sitting here naked as
>jaybirds fifty years ago."
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>"Well," Granny snickered, "Let's relive some old times."
>Whereupon the two stripped to the buff and sat down at the table.
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>"You know, honey," the little old lady breathlessly replied, "My
>nipples are as hot for you today as they were fifty years ago."
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>"I wouldn't be surprised," replied Gramps. "One's in your coffee and
>the other is in your oatmeal."


Thanks Rob!
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